A Working Mom

In my quest to find the secret to being a working mother and how to balance work, the house and of course motherhood, I found this article and thought I would share:

Pssst, Here's Some Dirt About Squeaky Clean Working Moms

by Lori A. Cascone

My friend subscribes to an e-mail discussion list for working moms, and she passed along a series of messages based on a rather passionate discussion. I thought it my duty as a writer with a sarcastic edge to spew some verbiage about the discussion, being I deem the subject matter right up there with abortion rights and equal pay for women.

Let me preface this with the fact that I'm only one-half of the working mom role. I'm the working part, not the mom just yet. Thus, I thought she sent me the e-mail because it was an interesting thread about marital stress. Or perhaps a list member admitted she was having a steamy affair in the office. Hmm. I was intrigued.

But these working moms weren't all a-flutter about the libido-enhancing herbs. They were engrossed in none other than a lively, impassioned discussion about the methodical finesse of cleaning. That's right. As in scrubbing toilet bowls, scouring refrigerators, wiping bathtubs, and mopping kitchen floors. Now, not only was I intrigued — I was also shocked.

I Worship Thee!
Please don't hurl tomatoes at your computer screen, but I must admit I've formed the habit of stereotyping working moms as cleaning klutzes. In a word: unclean. Not on themselves, but rather, in their homes. And the reason is because (get ready for a compliment) I can't fathom how a working mom has time to cook dinner for her family, let alone scrub shower stall tiles, when she only walks in the door after 6 p.m. every evening.

Then, of course, there's the inevitable fact that she awakens several times a night to breastfeed, burp, and diaper change. Not to mention that she rises and shines before the birds to get herself ready for another hectic day before awakening her brood and getting them ready for their day. I'm exhausted just reading that. And to think — she still carries the weight of eliminating dust balls? Go figure.

In a nutshell, here's what I surmised from this e-mail discussion: Working mothers really are superwomen. In the midst of all the muss and fuss that goes along with any given day, they're actually deeply concerned about keeping their homes in tip-top shape.

Like the pop song "I'm Every Woman," they really are every kind of woman (am I getting corny yet?).

They're modern, yet mindful of the "good old" traditional values of a warm, clean, welcoming haven for their spouses and kids — so important in this day and age when the home is considered a mere way station sandwiched between school, sports, and sleepovers.

They're multitasking geniuses, capable of perfecting their many roles with a keen sense of time management (and a sense of humor).

They're smart, but modest — these women trolled the Web and hoofed it to libraries in their quest to find the best sources for achieving the stature of "domestic deity."

And they didn't brag about it either — though they were probably on the Web at 2 a.m. while rocking their baby back to sleep or in the library zipping around the aisles while they waited for their 10-year-old's karate class to end.

But enough of the admiration. I figure all the information I extracted from those e-mail messages may have an impact on working moms everywhere. I'll share the wealth, and perhaps one day refer to this article if ever I become engrossed in maternal madness and start to panic over how to — gasp — fit a proper cleaning method in my own chaotic home. Either that or I'll simply rely on what popped into my mind the first time I read the threaded discussion: 1-800-HOUSEKEEPER.

Quotes From Panic-Stricken Moms
(Names have been omitted out of respect for the moms' privacy — no one wants their mother-in-law knowing these blunders.)

• "It took me an hour to clean a bathroom, and I have three! First, I started wiping the sink, only to figure out I had to clear it off first. I went on to scrubbing the toilet, but oops! I had to rinse the brush in the sink, and then realized I had to clean it all over again!"
  
  
• "This is my daughter's last week at childcare, and then she nervously starts her pre-K class. Me? I just hope I can figure out whether I'm supposed to vacuum or dust-mop the wood floors!"
  
  
• "I never can keep it straight what has to be done first, and almost inevitably, I have to redo something."
  
  
• "I've recently subscribed to four cleaning lists to help me in my confused and domestically challenged life."
  
  
• (in response to that last quote): "I think that borders on masochism!"

Recommended Reads

• "Home Comforts: The Art and Science of Keeping House," by Cheryl Mendelson Says one working mom: "This explains how, why, and when to clean things and take care of your home, in general. I really like the book and refer to it at least once a month." (If you'd like to buy it online, check out Amazon.com.)
  
  
• "Speed Cleaning," by Jeff Campbell The same mom says this tome gives the nitty-gritty about how to clean as efficiently as possible — the author even assigns roles if there are two or more cleaning mavens in the house. (If you'd like to buy it online, check out Amazon.com.)